Happy Father's Day!

Happy Father's Day!

• My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me. 
• Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. 
• Becoming a father is easy enough, but being one can be very rough. 
• Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow. 
• Well, an iPad would be nice for Father's Day, but I'd settle for 20 minutes of damn silence. 

Jake: What does your father do for a living?
Matt: He's a magician. He performs tricks, like sawing people in half.
Jake: Do you have any brothers or sisters?
Matt: Yep, four half-sisters and a half-brother. 

Q: What did baby corn say to mama corn?
A: Where's popcorn? 

Q: What do you call your dad when he falls through the ice? 
A: a POPsicle! 

Q: How do fathers exercise on the beach? 
A: By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini. 

Q: How do you know your dad is planning for the future? 
A: He buys two cases of beer instead of one. 

Q: Why did the baby strawberry cry? 
A: Because his dad was in a jam! 

Q: What did the daddy tomato say to the baby tomato? 
A: Catch up! 

Q: What did daddy spider say to baby spider? 
A: You spend too much time on the web. 

Q: What do you call the father you walk all over? 
A: Stepdad. 

Man: How old is your father?
Child: As old as me.
Man: How it is possible?
Child: He became a father only when I was born. 

Dad: "Hey babe, you smell that?"
Mom: "No."
Dad: "Me neither, start cooking." 

source: Jokes4us